I mean, why, when I think I'm being a cool mom, do I get slammed by my insane children?
An early evening walk to buy some fun workbooks, a pack of brand-new crayons, a fresh pad of drawing paper and then a spontaneous idea to eat an impromptu Golden Arches dinner turned into screaming, crying and general nerve-grating behavior.
Why? WHY?
It's pointless to try and analyze exactly went down to try and reach a rational explanation as to why the magic went "Poof!" into the early evening air...
...it just did.
'Cause that's what happens with the three young kids that rule my life. Sometimes the magical moments evaporate faster than I can say "Happy Meal."
After the last whiny one finally fell asleep, I laid back on the couch with my arm over my eyes and I thought "I feel crappy. My life is soooo damn good and I still feel crappy."
I had one of those moments when the to-do list floods my brain and drowns any chance of my mood breaking through to the surface. And I wondered when I will ever ever ever feel "on top of it all" again.
So - to combat this evening of crushing blows to my mommy self-esteem where my voice ended up sounding way harsher than I ever really want it to sound, I decided to pat myself on the back.
Hell yeah.
I dug deep and decided to pull out a lil' award that my bloggy friend, Em, bestowed on me a little over a week ago.
Here it is:
Yeah, that crying whiny face is pretty much what my kids ended up looking like tonight so it's all just perfectly appropriate.
The details of this award dictate that I list ONE thing I do NOT like about myself as a mom and SEVEN things I DO like about myself as a mom. Or something like that.
1) I don't like that I yell and that my voice sounds mean sometimes when I do. I think if I were on that show "Supernanny," I would watch myself on that little DVD player and I would hear my voice and I would melt into a pile of embarrassment.
Moving on.....seven good things?
1) I like to dance with my kids to fun music. We were just shimmying, funking and groovin' it up to Chris Cornell's new album yesterday. It was awesome.
2) I like to kiss and hug on them endlessly. And they like it too.
3) I like to make them breakfast. I like the idea of giving them eggs and bacon and jelly toast to fill their bellies and kick-start their day.
4) I like to tuck them in at night. I like knowing they are safe and sound in a clean cozy bed.
5) I like to hang outside with them in the yard. I like to push them on the swings, watch them jump on the trampoline and generally just applaud them when they say "Look at me mama!!"
6) I like to listen to them. I love any story from any part of their day or night. A dream, a nightmare, a school moment - anything. If they want to chat, I'm there to listen.
7) I like to do spontaneous fun things with them even when it backfires on me. A trip to the pier, an outing to the pony rides, a last-minute backyard playdate with a group of friends, a Sunday afternoon at the park - I like to get out and have fun. With them.
That was marginally difficult.
And now I am supposed to hand it out to other mamas. Well, come on now - if
you're reading this post, you deserve this award. Plain and simple. If you're a
mama making it through the day and loving your kids inside out, then take this,
it's yours too.
Don't you know that's the point by now?
That you are ALL "Moms of the Year!?"
I certainly hope you know that. But in case you need a little reminding, I'm
reminding you.
But just for kicks, I'll call out a couple chicks who I've been thinking about as
Moms of the Year recently -
Kath - my dearest friend who is dealing with life stuff with the strength that a good
daughter does. You are SOOO Mom of the Year. Do you know that??
Heather from The Extraordinary Ordinary - every time I go over there, I'm all
blown away by her strength of expression as a mother and as a woman. Incredible.
Sticky from Not Too Sticky - she just jumps off the page with her sincerity and her
love for her family. She is honest and real and I love reading her.
And finally - Nature Lovin' Super Mama. She is another chick who inspires me with
her honesty and her enthusiasm for life and her surroundings. I think I'm living
vicariously through her. Check out her scene if you need a change of pace and a
shift in scenery.
Okay all you mamas - happy Mom Of the Year Award Day.
Thanks for helping me pull myself out of this lil' ol' funk.
maybe that's what the expression "it's the little things that mean so much" means. it's when your expectations of success are low that you are pleasantly surprised by how happy and calm everyone stayed. for me, it's ALWAYS when i cook up something that i just KNOW the boys will love that all hell seems to break loose.
ReplyDeleteOh yeah!!! I'm so glad I could help you get your Mama Mojo back up and running.
ReplyDeleteBecause you. do. rock!
And that Supernanny thing - oh yeah - that scenario runs through my head at least once a week.
Today is another day, my friend.
When you say the beds are clean, what do you mean exactly? Does washing sheets once a month count as clean? :)
ReplyDeleteI hate it when that happens with the kids.... I've definitely been there. I think you deserve a Lemonade Award, too, for turning around your bad night and turning it into a celebration of the things you love about being a mom. :)
ReplyDeleteI have come to the conclusion, that there is no figuring out toddlers. They make no sense. Mine scream and cry like I'm pulling teeth. What I am trying to do is take them to the park:P I am such a mean Mommy:( Then they finally get to the park and it's the same fits again to get them home. It's a viscous cycle I tell you!
ReplyDeleteThank you.
ReplyDeleteI find myself on the couch with my arm thrown up over my face quite often. And I get all crabby and impatient when everything hits the fan too. I think we all do. But it feels good to remember what you're doing well doesn't it?
Moms just rock, plain and simple.
Well done you for pulling yourself out of the funk and appreciating yourself! This is a lesson we can all learn from.
ReplyDeleteWell, that was the nicest thing anyone has ever said about me and my littlest blog! You brought a tear to my eye...(and not cuz I poked it this morning trying to wear mascara for a change)
ReplyDeleteSeriously, you are the best - thank you so much!
PS- you sound like the greatest mom -don't you worry...
ReplyDeleteCongratulations! You TRULY deserve the award.
ReplyDeleteI think it's like a chain reaction - when one little one goes off the deep end, they ALL go off the deep end, many times mommy included.
Glad you came through it mostly unscathed ;)
I think we all have had those Supernanny moments.....but all the hugs and kisses and spontaneous fun will erase those moments in our childrens' eyes......I can really never remember my mother losing her cool with me, but I know she did.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing your award!
I LOVE YOU! let me tell you why...first off I totally loved when EM made you "mom of the year", and loved your post on it. Secondly, you tell it how it is, no b.s. just the pure truth...funny,sad,bit*chy,sassy, ect...love it. Thirdly, I look forward to your comments on my page, and now a shout out....i am honored you feel that way. I thought my blog was crap next to yours...thank you for makeing my day....and everyone elses with you witty charisma! :)Have a ROCKIN' DAY!
ReplyDeleteWill you be MY mom? =)
ReplyDeleteYou ate totally doing a good job, Mom!
ReplyDeleteYou TOTALLY deserve Mom of the Year my friend.
ReplyDeleteWay to go on planning your super fun outing. I also loved your 7 good things. Excellent.
AND ... I keep forgetting to ask you how the no sweets for Lent is going? YOU ARE MY IDOL for taking that on! XO
Geez, man...thanks for the cool honor. You touched my soul with those comments. Really.
ReplyDeleteIt's so strange that as moms we almost expect a certain perfection each day. You can be doing all "super-momma" things with your kids and then the sh** hits the fan and you feel crappy about yourself. You know? Why do we expect so much CONSTANTLY from ourselves?
Thanks for putting things back in perspective. It's important to remember (and celebrate!) the things we do well.
And you, my friend, do LOTS of this mom stuff really, really, well. :-)
Thanks for reminding me I'm normal for having days like that at times.
ReplyDeleteI just went back in and gave all my little ones another little kiss on the forehead, now I feel relaxed and ready for bed...
Thanks again. You are great!
if it makes you feel any better, it does get easier, and better and they get older. fast. REALLY fast. thankfully i still feel young as they get older! (my girls are 11, 12, 17 and 19). it's still busy, but it gets MUCH easier. sleep is the key. as they get older, you WILL get more sleep. then life will seem so much 'doable'!!!
ReplyDeletehugs!!!