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Sunday, July 26, 2009

BlogHer '09: The Top 10 Things I Learned as a First Time Attendee

Written by Lee

This will be one of a few posts where I try to digest and share some of the BlogHer '09 conference experience with you. And the keyword there is "digest." A BlogHer conference is a completely over-stimulating experience and most of the time, I felt like a 4-year-old at a fast-paced circus freak show just wide-eyed looking around at the myriad of colorful activity, complete with bright pink cotton candy clouds and glittery unicorns, swirling around me.

I'm exhausted to the bone, dehydrated, slightly hungover, and my mind is racing with too many thoughts but I am managing to pull together this Top 10 list during my plane ride home while all is fresh in my mind and before I get home and my wondrous kids help to make this fantabulous BlogHer experience seem like a distant memory.


So without further ado, here is the Top 10 Things I Learned as a Newbie at BlogHer '09:


10) Top 10 posts are good ideas for posts on your blog.

The smart, friendly and invincible Jessica from Jessica Knows bestowed this piece of advice during a Room of Your Own Session on Day One. Readers generally like Top 10 lists, Jessica told us, and so they yield better traffic than regular posts. Kinda makes me wonder if I should just start a new blog that consists of only Top 10 Lists.

9) Do not gush to your favorite bloggers on the first night.
No matter how mellow and generally cool you are, you will seem like a total dweeb if you accost your favorite bloggers on the first night and spew praise on them.
This is partially because most everyone has spent the day traveling to get to BlogHer, people are tired and disoriented and it takes at least 12 hours to settle into the vibe of the conference. Reserve the first night for meeting up with some of the bloggers you have actually corresponded with and actually know somewhat, having a drink at the evening's parties and slowly integrating into the scene. Hyper over-inflated flattery towards your favorite big-time blogging rock stars will get you nowhere except waking up the next morning with a gushing hangover.

8) The kind of clothes and shoes you wear do not matter AT ALL.
I can not emphasize this one enough. All that matters is that you feel like YOU and that YOU are comfortable. There will be all kinds of women dressed in all kinds of ways from snazzy cocktail attire and stillettos to t-shirts and jeans and flip-flops. From all of the newbie wardrobe and shoe stressing I saw going on pre- BlogHer (read this to see my pre-conference thoughts), I can not believe how little this stuff matters. There are simply too many people there to care about what YOU are wearing. Just dress like YOU, feel like YOU, and YOU will be just fine.


7) Bring your own water. And chair.

It proved beyond difficult to find water when I needed it. Like a parched chick in the middle of a desert. PepsiCo was one of the major sponsors so there was always a guy dressed in a butler suit handing out soda on a tray (I am not kidding) but when it came to just a good ol' bottled water, it was tough to find. You get quite dehydrated walking around, squishing into over-crowded sessions and talking all.day.and.night.LONG. so bring your own water stash. And speaking of those overcrowded sessions, there were NEVER enough chairs. So you might want to carry a folding beach/lawn chair around with you too.

6) Deep links are good for your Google Page Rank.
I can't quite get over how much I love the term "deep links." It just makes my shudder in all of the right places. So what are deep links?

Deep links (*shudder*) are links that get readers to old posts of yours. Google Page Rank values these links MORE than just people showing up on your current home page. If another blogger links to some kick-ass post that you wrote a few months ago, that is considered a deep link. Someone clicking on that link will help you crawl up the Google Page Rank chart.

And now what is Google Page Rank exactly?
Google assigns each blog a page rank with 1 being the lowest/worst rank and 10 being the highest rank and the BEST rank you can get. Your blog is graded and ranked by where it shows up in Google under search terms. If you show up often on Page One of a Google Search, you are in damn good shape. If you don't ever show up in a Google search, you may as well quit your blog. Just kidding. Don't quit. Just do what you need to to improve. Like start getting people you know to deep link to you.

In summary, I learned that deep links affect your Google Page Rank and that page rank really matters to a lot of bloggers so maybe it should start mattering to me too. But I'm not so sure I can really wrap my head around all of this stat stuff. BUT if you care about page rank, then write some timeless posts that bloggers will want to remember and reference (and thus deep link to) all throughout blogging history.

5) Some bloggers will sincerely want to meet you. Some will not.

To be honest, I don't really think I learned this while at BlogHer. I think I knew it going in but I was reminded of it in various instances and thought it was worth putting on the list. Well-known bloggers, new bloggers and all kinds of bloggers in between, every kind of personality and motive is represented. I will say overall that BlogHer was an extremely friendly environment with lots of hugs, hand-shaking and business card exchanging. But there are obviously plenty of bloggers who will only want to meet and hobnob with the "famous" bloggers so if you are not one of them, they will not want to chat for long.

On the flip-side there were quite a few well-known bloggers that I met who were so cool and real and who sincerely wanted to chat even though I am basically no one in the blogging world. Some bloggers only have their eye on the virtual prize of increasing their exposure and numbers while others are in it simply for their love of writing and this community of writers. I was lucky enough to meet more of the latter. The bloggers who complain about cliques etc. are only saying that because they only want to hang with the "famous" bloggers. There are plenty of cool bloggers to hang with if you are willing to give some of the lesser known bloggers a chance.


4) Bring your favorite kind of tissue to the Community Keynote.
The community keynote was one of the most inspiring parts of the conference for me. I spent most of the almost two hours of sitting there with tears streaming down my face as I listened to the gift of words and story from these talented writers. The hotel has crappy cheap tissues in the room but at least I grabbed a few before the keynote just in case. Next year if I go, I will bring a box of Kleenex Ultra-Soft tissues and place it in the middle of the table for all to use if needed. If I'm with Heather of the EO again, we will likely go through the entire box.

3) Stressing out over the swag is totally and utterly NOT worth it.

The talk of the potential swag and the race to get it at the beginning of each party was a total joke. I'm not sure what's up with all of these women needing to push and shove and swarm over one another to get a paper bag filled with a sponge, some lip gloss and a vibrator but that was the general scene with the start of each and every party. Next year, I think the swag should only be handed out to bloggers displaying good behavior during the party. Like once the party has started, someone could walk around and hand swag bags to people who are mellow. And if you start crowding the swag dispenser, you will get kicked out.

Overall there was NOTHING given in any swag bag I got or any that I heard of anyone else getting that should make someone act like an idiot. So if you go next year as first- timer, relax about the swag. Nothing in those bags will change your life.

2) Meeting some bloggers in real life WILL change your life.
I knew I would dig some of the bloggers I read in real life. Some I had exchanged emails with, one I had spoken to, and others I just had just read and left comments from time to time. Other bloggers I had only read a few times before I met them. Still others I had not read at. all. But through a variety of circumstances, I met a few bloggers during BlogHer who I now can call friends. And if they lived in LA, we would be great friends who would hang out A LOT. At this conference, I experienced the phenomenon that I have only heard others talk about before - forming a relationship online and bringing it into real life. I can honestly say my heart was sad saying goodbye to my new friends and realizing that who knows when we will be able to hang out again. I can feel with a few of my blogging friends that our relationship will only grow and deepen despite the miles. And that? Is awesome.


And the number one, most important thing I learned at BlogHer '09 is....

1) Trust that you have a story to tell.
I attended an amazing Room of Your Own session about blogging as storytelling. The room was filled with all kinds of bloggers including some of the best-known blogging storytellers around. The session took on the form of a writing support group if you will and along with the community keynote, this session inspired me to my core. I have quite a few hang-ups and a healthy dose of fear about the kind of writer and storyteller that I am and am not, but this session helped me to focus on the most important thing I, or any writer, needs to know -

"Trust that you have a story to tell."

I have been blessed with an incredible "normal" life thus far with very little drama and no tragedy as of yet and I often get hung up thinking I am not "edgy" enough or interesting enough or smart enough or anything enough to be a really good writer. But I was reminded by a cool dude and an awesome writer in the course of this session that we all have a story to tell. But in order to tell it, you have to trust in it. So that is what I plan to start doing.

To wrap this up, I'll say look for some changes around here. No creative endeavor can stay stagnant. It needs to evolve and grow so I have some thoughts in the works after all of this inspiration. Thanks to all for supporting this place of ours... there's more good stuff to come.

89 comments:

  1. Great post, Lee. I went to Blogher for the first time two years ago and met so many amazing women I am still lucky to be in touch with. This was the first year I missed it since I started going and it is nice to hear a newbie's story. It was a big brain explosion for me the first time, too. Thank you for sharing.

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  2. Oh man, I wish I met you there! I love your blog, (non-blog? J/K:) and I agree fervently with your points- except deep links and pagerank, cause I ain't know nothing about all that technical hot mess.;)

    This was my first BlogHer, and while I really enjoyed it, I am so tired and tuckered out that I can't believe I'm up reading Blogs. Except I missed that constant swirl of voices all around me.

    The swag thing did make me really sad. There is no THING worth treating your fellow sisters like that. I saw a mom with bruises shaped like a hand on her arm, and I saw grown women sneaking in the back door of a party they weren't invited to to quietly steal bags from the bathroom and leave. Gross. But I'm trying to not let the Swag Hags (Hat tip to Suburban Turmoil on that one, she coined it overshadow the magic of the rest. Thanks for a great top 10 list! JKnows would be proud.:)

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  3. I saw so much talk about BlogHer on Twitter and on various blogs recently, and being behind the times it was the first year I'd heard of BlogHer, that I was interested. Thanks for sharing.

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  4. Great post, and I agree - the swag hunters really {almost} ruined it.

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  5. Great post chica. Good summary, well thought out. Oh and I would just add to number five "and some will tell you which words you can and cannot utter"

    xoxo

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  6. So you're telling me a free vibrator won't change my life?

    Who knew!?

    Glad you're home :-)

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  7. Great post!

    Conferences with swag are always ridiculous. Work ones I have been to are the same way. Picutre a bunch of wealthy international attorneys fighting over frisbees or jumpropes given away at parties. Ridiculous!

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  8. first- Kudos to you for being able to compose yourself so well to be able to compile this post alread- I'm not there yet!I am so impressed with you- this is all very true. However- I want names, girl! I hope I wasn't one of the bad people. It was so nice to meet and talk to you and Deb.

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  9. Glad to see some activity here again! LOL :) Glad you had fun!

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  10. It was great to meet you this weekend. Even though I seemed "shy" which was actually code for "hungover" but whatever.

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  11. Great post Lee! So happy you had such a great time, and sorry we didn't find each other! ;-)

    Great point about Deep Linking, btw...I have to get better about that.

    Jay

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  12. Great post! Sounds like you had a great time!

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  13. Sounds like you had a great time, Lee! Love the Top Ten.
    Maybe I'll get to go next year - I will gladly share tissues with you...

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  14. I am so excited to hear your thoughts on BlogHer, I know that I can trust you to give a fair and balanced report back on the weekends events and to share the important stuff with us (not just how much swag you got and what parties you got into that other lesser connected people did not.)

    Your #1 point, even though it was only short part of your post, ressonated with me. With so many bloggers out there with so much drama/edge/craziness/excitement I often times feel like "just plain Catherine" "just plain boring."

    Thanks for sharing Lee I always look forward to seeing what you have going on around here.

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  15. what a great wrap up post. I am so excited that you have a great time and this post made me want to go even more next year. I can't wait.

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  16. thanks for sharing -

    I have a seen a few photos of some of the parties - not my 'thing' to feel all 22 again in a mosh pit. Glad to know you really did learn something there.

    BTW - I do live in the LA area...so...

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  17. Wow Lee - now I really feel like crap for not going - i'll start saving my pennies now for next year...

    Only it sounds like a TRUE mom without a blog, may be a LITTLE, TEENSY-WEENSY bit out of her element????

    Though it would be fun to mix it up with the "swag-hags" just for a laugh!

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  18. Wow - awesome recap and so informative. Sounds like over all it was a stellar time and you are inspired to keep going (which makes it all worthwile).

    I can't wait to see (be a part of), the future of MWOB.

    P.S. Any good dirt on Deb? Hee Hee.

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  19. Great post. Still pouting that I didn't get to meet you. I'm still trying to figure out how I can see your show while I'm in So Cal next month.

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  20. Awesome post. One of the hardest things for me to swallow was when a few people were like "Um, whatever" when I approached them as a fan of their blog. Ha.

    This is a REALLY good top 10 list.

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  21. Thanks for this post. I didn't get the chance to attend and this was just the inspiration I need for my own writing endeavors.

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  22. This is one of the best posts I've read about BlogHer!

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  23. Excellent post- and I am not just sayin that for the deep link. ;)

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  24. Glad you had fun, like your points, but the reason I read your blog is because you are GREAT at telling your story. I'm glad you gained greater confidence, because I'm selfish and I think this will lead to better reading!

    I know a vibrator wouldn't change my life, but a few more friends could. I'll have to think about Blog Her for next year.

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  25. I'll deep link you anytime, babe. Just ask. :)
    It was so fabulous meeting you!

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  26. What a great post! Although now I'm feeling kind of dumb about "gushing" to a *famous blogger* who was standing behind me in the check-in line at the Sheraton. At least I kept it short. ;-)

    #6 and #10 were also ingrained in me too, further proving they did a great job of getting their points across.

    This is my favorite wrap-up to date. Thanks for posting!

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  27. This was my 4th BlogHer - and I still learned something from this post.

    The important point we all need to re-iterate all year is that the clothes you wear to blogher do not matter! (really, I wore the same clothes both days.)

    That and swag is nice but not the reason for attending a party.

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  28. Great post, thank you for sharing those thoughts! I learned what a "deep link" is, and that it is not, in fact, anything nearly as dirty as it sounds. :-P

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  29. I came over from a tweeted link and really enjoyed your summary. It was pretty bang on.

    I'll be interested to read through your archives. But first I need to decompress from BlogHer... I'm sure no one else feels that way.

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  30. Love this post. And, I SO agree about the clothes thing. Ditto could be applied to how much a person weighs, how much she spends on her shoes, whether or not she has had a hair cut or done her roots, etc. It just did not matter one tiny bit.

    I'm off to go learn more about this "deep link" stuff. I think my husband will appreciate it. ; )

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  31. This is a great wrap-up! And I agree. I am still sad that a greedy few gave the rest of us a bad name. I had a great time and am trying to shake the negativity from it all.

    My favorite swag suite was the Energizer Bunny one and I receiving nothing from it except for a damned good time. Seriously - folks were coming to the entrance, grabbing a bag and hightailing it out of there. I actually went in, ate some food, relaxed and had some great conversation. Now, that is my kind of suite!

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  32. Love your post. I was in the storytelling panel also and I think there needs to be a writing track or a writing lab at BlogHer10 -- that's what I wrote my post-BlogHer post about - bloggers are writers. We need a chance to work on the writing.

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  33. What a great post. I'm so sad I didn't get to go. I didn't know what I was going to be missing until it was too late :(

    Question - How do you find out your page rank?

    What are some of your favorite new blogs to read?

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  34. Great post! Thanks to rockandrollmama's tweet about it, I'll be hanging around now.

    (Of course, whether that's a good or bad thing will have to be for you to judge...) ;)

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  35. Very good post. It was my first time attending too. I wish I had got to know more people. I generally spend my time alone walking around trying to look approachable/fit in. It didn't work so well. I don't think I really formed any solid relationships, but I wish I had.

    There was so much hype about what to wear it was crazy. Then I got there and realized it didn't matter at all!

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  36. This is a beautiful post! I missed this year, but from what I know of BlogHer, every word is true.

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  37. So sad I couldnt be there. We would have had a blast!

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  38. Very cool list, sounds like an excellent event!

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  39. oh that #1. that session was really inspiring and everything i wish blogher was all about.

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  40. Lee,
    It was SO nice to meet you (even if you didn't remember my name even after I gave you like 17 business cards). I really enjoyed hanging out with you and Deb (that was her name, right?).

    This post sums up my feelings for Blogher09. Maybe instead of posting on my blog, I'll just link to you!!

    Keep in touch!

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  41. I loved this list. As always, you get to the nitty gritty of things. I feel like I was "there" in a way.

    I love the point about telling your story. I agree, this is what blogging is all about. It's so easy to let the fear paralyze you ("I'm not that interesting", "People don't care what I have to say.") Trusting in your story is really key. So important to remember.

    You, my friend ALWAYS tell a good story. I can't wait to hear more about the conference and to hear some of your (and Deb's!!) new ideas. Welcome home....let's talk soon :-)

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  42. OMG!!!!! 46 comments?????????!!!!!!!!!!!!

    wow :-)

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  43. This is an awesome post. Thanks to herbadmother for tweeting about it! It sounds like you learned a lot, and thanks for sharing it. I haven't been to BlogHer, and most likely will never get to go, so I really appreciate others passing on their wisdom!

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  44. Great post, Lee. Honestly, meeting you was a huge highlight of the convention... You are so excellent. And I am really pissed I missed that session on deep links. I intended to learn that kind of thing and totally got swept up completely in meeting people and just soaking up and/or watching the people I admire do their thing. I'll go about it a little different next year. Perhaps you could help me out with a little consult beforehand and a reality-slap mid-convention? :)

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  45. Oh, and you are totally right about the damn shoes! I wore my huge, orthotic walking shoes everyday and my feet were delighted, while not one person even looked at my feet. ;)

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  46. I think I'll just link to this for my blogher post. Because I'm tired and lazy and Maggie G doesn't have to do anything she doesn't want to do.

    Seriously though. I absolutely LOVED hanging with you and Deb. I don't want too much time to go by before we do it again. (Deep link, that is.)

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  47. Wow, now it's MY turn to gush to you and say I loved this post, from start to finish. I am a new blogger, bummed to not have attended BlogHer this year. So bummed that when the tickets went on sale, I bought one immediately. Thanks for the new girl perspective- I loved it

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  48. YES! To everything.

    It was great meeting you Lee. I'm sorry I was so wonky and distracted - I would have loved to have spent some one-on-one time.

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  49. Excellent! I wished that I had decided to go to Blogher and this summary seemed to really capture what it should be about.

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  50. This was a great roundup of the weekend. I may even link it because I haven't written anything yet and my head is still swimming!

    Did I meet you? If not, shame on me because you sound like my kind of gal. {going to check my card stash now...}

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  51. Well, I couldn't agree with you more. Especially #2...hanging you was one of the highlights. Why don't you live in Chicago?

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  52. This is one of the best posts I've read that recaps BlogHer! Thank you Lee. I am linking to your post in my blog today.

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  53. I fully agree with the clothing part! It truly was amazing how many posts pre blogger there were where people were stressing about clothes. I even had a fashion show for my mom and sister to get their approval of what to wear.
    Be comfortable is my advice for next year!

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  54. Oh, and I just realized today that my post yesterday was a Top 11 list that I wrote on Sunday night. I am so on the cutting edge - ha! Is 11 ok or do they really recommend only 10? :)

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  55. Great post. I'm so relieved to be reading some positive posts about BlogHer. All the posts I was reading last night were negative!

    What exactly constitutes a 'well-known' blogger. That's my question.

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  56. wow. thanks for all that...

    Love the bit about trusting that you have a story to tell... that's why I started this nonsense....

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  57. Hopping over from Heathers blog, thanks for the list! I couldn't go this year..maybe next, but its nice to know what to expect.

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  58. i feel i should clarify and expound on number 4. you should bring the favorite tissue to the keynote AND while walking around the expo hall. you never know when you might run into a PBS Kids show host. that will really turn on the waterworks!

    as you know, i am so with you on the storytelling. and the lawn chair.

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  59. Lee Lee Lee Lee Lee Lee Lee.

    What a pleasure you were.

    And, one more time for the record, I never once thought you deserved that gushing hangover. It never once crossed my mind that you were a dweeb. We all acted exactly the same way and that's why it was so intense that first night.

    I'm so glad we got to spend a decent amount of time together.

    xo

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  60. OH - and one more time. This is a wonderful, wonderful post. :)

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  61. DAMMIT - I meant "one more thing" not "one more time."

    Grrrrrrrr.

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  62. Lee- once again you make me smile. This post re-affirmed for me all of the great experiences I has while I was there.

    I enjoyed all the good, and the not-so good I just swept under the carpet. These experiences are what WE make them- and I am choosing to make this one a great one.

    xoxoxo I loved meeting you- it was fantastic.

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  63. Just wanted to leave a fourth comment since I'm on a roll. Heh. ;) ;) ;)

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  64. Hey, Vodka Mom butted in line!

    Going now. Promise.

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  65. I really enjoyed reading this post. I would love to attend Blogher 10, but I would be one of those not so famous "bloggers". I write because I love to write. I do feel like I have a story to tell, even if only my family reads it. I just found your blog through Heather at EO. So glad that I did. Now I need to go and explore a little more.

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  66. Wow, this is a great post. This was my first year and I couldn't agree with you more!

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  67. New York next year ?? The King will surely havee a full cab ...no ladies ??? C'mon !!

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  68. There've been so many comments already so I'll just toss out a quick thank you. I've always been curious about BlogHer and love your casual, funny, but informative style here.

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  69. Wow, you sure nailed it on this one. The Storytelling session was indeed awesome, and I'm so glad I got to meet you, even if it was the very last party at the very last minute. You and Deb were so cool and funny! I'll be checking in on you...

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  70. Loved reading this! Very informative, thank you. And isn't it sad how free stuff (did they really give away vibrators???) can bring out the absolute worst in people?

    I have never yet been to a BlogHer, but I hope to make it someday! :)

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  71. This was the BEST post i have read about BlogHer thus far-you rock lee thanks for sharing your knowledge

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  72. this is good info for someone who has not been. Like me. Now, I want to know...did you really get a vibrator in the swag bag? Seriously?

    And I love the number one thing you learned. There used to be a segment on a saturday morning news show titled something like that. I LOVED that segment. They would pick a throw a dart at a map, go to the city where the dart landed, pick an address out of a phone book, go to the door and interview that person, find out their story and write about it. I loved hearing about people's lives. Just regular people, and they ALL had a story, even if they didn't think they did. Fascinating.

    Great post!!!

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  73. I love you and loved playing with you!!! I totally agree with your tips, especially the clothes. I was so worried and freaked out about what to wear and really, I was most comfortable in my flip flops and jeans, just like I wear at home (imagine that!).
    Anyhoo...i love you and your tissues too. I had to rhyme. Miss you!!!

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  74. I loved your synopsis here. What a great breakdown and tips. I think what you've said is spot on. I wish I could have made it to the storytelling session, and spent more time chatting with bloggers.

    Looking forward to seeing what you have in store!

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  75. Lee -- our BFFy moment was so great and so perfect and OH MY GOD caught on camera....

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  76. Can you just deep link me? I think I might like it (snicker snicker).

    I am so bringing my own lawn chair, bottled water and booze to Blogher next year. Hell, I'll even bring a lawn chair for you, if you like.

    I'll be in Los Angeles for a week, early October. wanna hook-up? Of course, I'll have my three hooligans (posing as my children) and my husband with me : ).

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  77. Love this post! I'll certainly be on a mission now to create deep links. Although I didn't meet nearly enough people and not even everyone I wanted to meet, I think I'm fortunate that the people I did meet didn't snub me. That's even worse than fighting over swag.

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  78. Those are greeat lessons to be learned. I liked how you name any of the bloggers that didn't want to chat.

    You show a lot of character in that.

    I hope to be able to go next year. I wonder if it's held in Chicago every year?? Maybe it will come to Orlando

    I am happy for you and all the others that got to be a part of something so wonderful!

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  79. Hi Lee it's Loren from the elevator, Great post. I have always been confused about page rank, how to increase it etc. I think i missed that session, so your post is helpful. As far as the whole weekend goes, I was a bit overwhelmed too, but I had a great time.

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  80. Awesome post! I'm a noob blogger and have been really struggling with item #1. I don't know what story I have to tell!

    I wonder whether you are able to tell us who were the speakers at that seminar, so that I can go harass them... I mean, see if they have posted any of their tips/thoughts on the topic onto their actual blogs.

    Or, if you would be willing to pass along more about that, that'd be awesome too.

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  81. And hey! There's your top ten list. :)

    Enjoyed your post.

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  82. Great information! Thanks for sharing especially with those of us who have never attended but are interested in going next year.

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  83. i...DIDN'T....GET ENOUGH....TIME...WITH YOU!!!!

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  84. Great list, completely agree! I'm disappointed our paths never crossed, I really would have liked to meet you.

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