Written by Deb
This may seem extremely hard to believe, but I am a person with many faults. As in, LOTS. And what’s worse is that I am aware of them! There really is something to be said for that whole “ignorance is bliss” thing.
Anyway, today I am showcasing just one of those pesky faults of mine, and boy, is it a doozy. Drumroll, please…
I don’t handle change very well. No, I am not wording that correctly. I do okay with the changes in my life. In fact, I look forward to them. I find the good ones exhilarating, the bad ones, educational, and those in between are simply various shades of wonderful.
However, what I do not actually handle well is that time from when the old has ended and the new has begun. That time when the actual change is taking place. The transformative zone, if you will.
Whether I am waiting to find out if the loan for the new house has been approved, or if Moody Teen made the varsity swim team, or even what my new shade of hair color will look like dry, I get crazy. I just want to know, already! I just want it done. So I can start my newly changed life, whatever it may be.
I used to think it was simply impatience, but now I suspect it is something more. It is a lack of faith and a need for control. Not good. I am always trying to take a proverbial peek at life post-change and see if I might need to get involved in its birth… You know, in case God needs a hand.
So for today, I am going to just go with it. Lucky for me, this is a day with little change on the agenda. Or then again, if I let go and open myself up to anything, I might have a brand new outlook and a bold new attitude. Now that, my friends, is change I can believe in.
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Hee hee, nice last sentence my dear.
ReplyDeleteYou know I'm not a massively religious person, but I have found in these instances the mantra "let go and let God" can really help the crazies.
Except when it comes to hair color - "let go and let Loreal?"
(Love your title too - you naughty girl, you.)
I so understand what you mean. I get so anxious to see/get to the "next stage" that I totally go nuts in the "in between" moments. I often wonder what all I am missing in that transitional place...
ReplyDeletehee hee - INSTANT gratification I do believe it is called!
ReplyDeleteI can be a control freak too but I am working on it.
ReplyDeleteHi Deb! You know I will be the one to say to leave it in God's hands...he doesnt need your help. Honest, He can handle it. And since you ALREADY knew I was going to say that I will ask you something completely different.....If you move to a new house can I have your stove?
ReplyDeleteLove ya!!
I think I'm a little tired because as I read your post I just kept thinking about "THE CHANGE." You know the one I'm talking about? The Big Change that all husbands like to call IT when they talk about their moody wives in their mid-50's or so. Isn't that when THE CHANGE happens?
ReplyDeleteSorry Deb. To think about this when reading your post. But the blowing up your skirt and everything......
Don't be mad.
:-)
Yes, Deb, this is a "toughy" (as my mom used to say, pronounced "tuffy") - I think as strong mamas we are ALWAYS thinking we know what COULD be the best course of action for our families and our offspring. We just have to realize that getting lost in the moment obscures our view of the big picture.
ReplyDeleteSomeone, Somewhere must be invested in our big picture or left to our own devices...hmmm...scary thought... :)
Anyway, I say this like I'm on a "this is how I deal with change" soapbox, but I'm not, I'm the same and constantly struggling with it - I'm constantly trying to go with the flow more
- could help me save money on my anxiety meds! :)
Thanks for this post, Deb - sorry I'm a couple days behind on reading it.